The Infamous Ghetto Indoor Pool
So I’m trying to be a good little blogger and update this puppy every day. I’ve got two hours left before it’s tomorrow and I don’t have the picture I need to do the update I want, so we’re going into the vault.
A couple years ago I put the biggest above ground pool I could find in my living room. The pictures were posted to a bunch of those link collecting sites and almost 7000 people saw the pictures the first day. Every year or so they are rediscovered and they get a ton of hits. However, I’ve never publicly told the story of the pool and why I did it. Avast!
One day my friend Crystal sends me an IM. Here’s a dramatic rendition of the event :
Crystal: OMG! Ty, check out www.penguinwarehouse.com
So I did.
Lo and behold, it’s a site that apparently sells pet penguins. I didn’t realize it before that moment, but I had always wanted a pet penguin. Probably everyone has. I just never thought it was possible. Penguin Warehouse assured me that it was in fact possible :
Q: Do I need to provide a habitat for my penguin?
A: Most certainly! Each penguin species requires unique habitat requirements and your home environment needs to be made suitable for a penguin before purchase of such a pet. Most penguins require a decent sized salt-water non-chlorinated pool set at an appropriate temperature. In fact, some penguin species spend as much as 75% of their life in water. If you are interested in learning more, please look into one of our many penguin care books.
Needless to say, I was sold. If only I had a decent sized non-chlorinated pool. I sent an e-mail to the proprietors at Penguin Warehouse asking all the questions I had, and telling them I was ready to order. They had a variety of breeds and ages available, and after a couple hours of research, I decided on a Snares Island penguin. I was going to name him Magellan.
I was really excited. So excited, in fact, that I told everyone I knew that I was getting a pet penguin. Knowing me, most people weren’t too surprised, and most were excited by the idea as well. My parents offered the opinion that buying a penguin was a reckless and irresponsible thing to do. This was a very frequently offered opinion, however, so it was discarded.
Later that week I found myself at Costco buying frozen fruit. While wandering the aisles I couldn’t help but notice the large swimming pool in display. They had it sitting on its edge, and it towered over the shoppers at a height of 15 feet. I immediately thought that it would be really cool if I had a pool that big at my house. The only problem is that my backyard is small and the robomower might cut the pool up. I considered putting it in the garage, but decided that I like parking there too much.
Then it hit me that I could just put it in my living room. I had just moved into my house and didn’t have a dining table. I could easily move the living room furniture in there and put the pool in the living room. I wasn’t sure it would even fit, but I figured it was worth a try. My friends Jake and Crystal cautioned me that it could easily be a disaster, but I could tell that they really wanted to see it happen. I called my father, who is a carpenter, to see what he thought. I believe his quote was something like this :
“I know I always tell you not to do your crazy ideas and you usually do anyway, but listen to me on this one. Don’t do it. You could crack your foundation or flood your house”
That was enough to sway me. I made a little flow chart for you guys to help understand how I make decisions. If you want your life to be more interesting, try following it yourself with your decisions :
Clearly, it had to be done. I picked up one of the huge boxes containing the inflatable pools and put it in my cart. I checked out and had to drive home at about 10mph because the pool only fit halfway in my trunk.
First we cleared all of the furniture out of the room and unpacked the pool.
Then we unrolled the ground tarp. I didn’t know if I actually needed this, since the manufacturers carelessly ignored the possibility of indoor installation. In the end I decided to use it, because you can never be too safe when installing a pool in your house.
To ensure that the pool would be environmentally friendly, Crystal simulated a retarded dolphin swimming in the dry pool. It was a great success.
The way the pool works is that the outer ring is inflated, and as the pool is filled with water the ring rises and causes the pool to form its shape. Whoever came up with this idea is a genius madman. I’m sure that outdoors it’s a walk in the park, but doing this inside was quite nervewracking. I can’t really describe the nervous feeling of standing in the middle of the living room with the hose at full blast.
Then we waited…
…and waited… The pool was 3100 gallons, which is a lot more water than it seemed. As the pool slowly grew we’d marvel every five minutes at how cool it was. I actually had to stop for the night and restart the next morning. I believe it took around 8 hours total to get the sucker filled.
Finally the pool was completely full. Eager to celebrate, we tested the water. That’s when it dawned on me that the pool was never going to get any warmer than 72 degrees - for some reason I just thought outdoor pool = cold and indoor pool = warm. Oops. I was somewhat comforted by the fact that Magellan would probably appreciate the cold water.
Jake insisted that we try it out anyway, so we did. It’s very bizarre to be floating comfortably along in the pool while staring at the ceiling fan.
What I didn’t count on was the paranoia that the pool caused. I would routinely wake up, convinced that I heard a noise, and I would run my hand along the entire perimeter of the pool. The pool was 15 feet in diameter and barely fit into the room, so this was a bit of a chore.
A couple days later I started getting suspicious because the Penguin Warehouse people hadn’t written me back yet. One of my friends took a closer look at the site and realized that it is obviously a fake. He told me, and despite a brief attempt to cling to my hopes, I had to relent. A second look at the web site made it very clear that it was just a hoax.
With cold water and no penguin to occupy it, I was ready to get rid of the pool. Siphoning the water out was surprisingly easy. I put one end of a hose in the water, and brought the other end to the back edge of my property. Without any work on my part, the water started flowing. It was as if immaculate sucking had occured.
A neighbor came by with the bad news that I must have a leak in my sprinkler system because water was pumping out of my backyard at an alarming pace. He was a bit freaked out when I invited him in and he saw the pool. He never came by again.
Unable to get the last drops of water out, I dragged the pool outside and put it on the deck, where it sat for a couple months.
I read about Costco’s incredible return policy - essentially anything can be returned for any reason. We loaded the whole moldy mess onto my friend’s pickup truck - there was no chance it was fitting in its box. And hauled it to costco. Using a large shopping cart to transport it, I dumped the pool and its accessories in front of the returns counter, causing a bit of a scene. Here’s how the conversation went down:
Tynan : I’d like to return this swimming pool.
Woman : Is there something wrong with it?
Tynan : No.
Woman : Then why do you want to return it?
Tynan : Well, I put it in my house because I was going to buy a penguin, but I kept worrying that it was going to leak on my carpet. It’s not as sturdy as the one you had on display (this is true - the one on display was double walled)
The woman definitely did not believe me and just stared blankly.
Woman : I.. umm. I don’t think we can take this return. I’m going to get a manager.
Manager: Sir, can you tell me why you’d like to return this pool?
Tynan : I was going to buy a penguin, but I was worried the pool was going to leak on my carpet. It doesn’t say anywhere not to use it inside, but I don’t think it’s sturdy enough.
Manager: Are you being serious?
Tynan: Yes.
Manager: Ok… I guess we’ll take it.
I provided my receipt and got my money back. Not getting the penguin was a very sad event for me. I had already named Magellan and was extremely excited. I had read tons of information about penguins and was really excited about taking care of him. Since “losing” him, I have visited two aquariums and spent as much time with the penguins as possible. For Christmas my awesome sister bought me a plastic penguin named Magellan.
(8 votes, average: 4.5 out of 5)
Loading ...
January 13th, 2006 at 3:00 am
This is the funniest story I’ve read in the whole of today (probably yesterday and the day before that too… I can’t be sure about before then).
Ow, my sides hurt.
January 13th, 2006 at 9:28 am
Wow… That’s just… Wow…
January 13th, 2006 at 10:10 am
Oh… my… god… that has got to be the awesomest thing I have ever heard. I can’t believe there wasn’t a disaster. I think I woudl have been with your friends:
“My friends Jake and Crystal cautioned me that it could easily be a disaster, but I could tell that they really wanted to see it happen.”
Fun - check.
Insane - check.
Paranoia-inducing - check.
OK, it’s a go!
January 13th, 2006 at 10:23 am
[…] http://www.betterthanyourboyfriend.com/?p=89 Comments - […]
January 13th, 2006 at 10:45 am
I would not have believed it if pictures weren’t provided. That’s some crazy shit bro. As far as not getting the penguin, consider it a blessing in disguise. I don’t think they can be house trained. Appreciate the fact that your plastic penguin isn’t taking shits all over your pad. Imagine the smell. Not good. You lucked out.
January 13th, 2006 at 4:37 pm
Indoor Pools and Pet Penguins
I think that this story has to be one of the funniest stories that I have ever read.It involves Penguins, hoax websites, swimming pools, a house, a big refund and some damn fine determination.
January 13th, 2006 at 7:59 pm
I was mostly afraid for the penguin, I’m glad you didn’t get it.
January 14th, 2006 at 12:52 am
I want to have a swimming pool in my house now. This is insane!
January 15th, 2006 at 5:51 pm
[…] I just had to link to this - The Infamous Ghetto Inground Pool - long story short, guy thinks he’s getting a penguin (it was a scam) and puts one of those giant inflatable pools in his lounge room. Genius! […]
January 16th, 2006 at 2:16 am
lol…
I would be afraid for the Penguin too.
But… I would’ve kept the pool. Who doesn’t want an indoor pool.
January 17th, 2006 at 1:18 pm
A lovely story. Thank you so much for sharing (I came via Arbroath).
Ajit
January 17th, 2006 at 5:14 pm
Absolutely brilliant!! Sounds like something that would usually be done by drunk people! *Laughs*
January 17th, 2006 at 6:42 pm
inspirational
January 18th, 2006 at 9:18 pm
Dear Sir,
You obviously are a smart man! I too am a fellow Penguin lover and had never thought of erecting a pool in the living room for these fine feathered friends. It is my hope that someday eveyone who wants a Penguin can have a Penguin. I have attempted to take my birds, or ‘lads’ as I call them, to waterparks, pizza restaurants and other places. The people are always quite happy to see the lads and sometimes offer them a little sip or two of their drinks. However the proprietors have a bias against the wonderful birds. In 2008 I plan to make another run at the presidency under my ‘Penguin Platform’. If Penguins were more widespread in our great country there would be many more jobs. Just think of the krill, herring and squid farms to feed the birds. And then there would be iceberg delivery services to keep them happy. Not to mention groomers to keep their feathers looking spiffy!
A very good day to you!
Gruntie
January 18th, 2006 at 10:10 pm
[…] The Infamous Ghetto Indoor Pool not only is a great story, but has detialed photos of how to install a swimming pool inside your home. No contractor required. […]
January 20th, 2006 at 12:18 am
why didnt you go for a dolphin after not getting the penguin??
January 20th, 2006 at 2:50 am
WOW~ loved the idea.Wish i was their too
January 20th, 2006 at 8:37 am
Nice job. The only thing that I would be worried about it is a gallon of water weighs about 8 lbs. That would make that pool HEAVY and I would support the floor from underneath.
January 20th, 2006 at 8:57 am
[…] I’m sure a “You Might Be A Redneck” joke belongs here, but I just can’t bring myself to do it. […]
January 20th, 2006 at 11:28 am
Im sorry you didnt get your pet penguin. I bet that would have been cool. You could put him/her on a leash and waddle it down the street with all your neighbors being jealous that you have a penguin and they dont…not to mention the ass you would pull with a pet penguin..”oh what a cute penguin!”…score.
January 20th, 2006 at 1:11 pm
If this storys true, how come i saw these indoor pool photos months ago on a different site?.
January 20th, 2006 at 2:05 pm
I want a penguin too! I was tempted to steal a penguin statue thing from a restaurant once…my friends talked me out of it.
January 20th, 2006 at 2:09 pm
The floor of your apartment / house is probably not built to hold that much weight. A 3K gallon pool weighs over 12 tons!!!! Would you park a large dumptruck in the middle of your living room? I would take that thing down and be happy that no one has been hurt/killed by it yet (especially the people living below you!).
January 20th, 2006 at 3:01 pm
Thanks Ginger. You probably never ate dirt or had fun when you were a kid either. We get it, they did it, and it worked without causing any damage. Best things I’ve read in a while. Good on you.
January 20th, 2006 at 6:43 pm
This has got to be the most amazing story I have heard in the past few months. I wish I could have witnessed this. Slip and slide in the dorm hallways is as far as I have been. You rock! Was that picture of the ceramic claw bathtub over the fire with the people piled in and the title of “redneck hot tub” in your backyard as well? I also agree with your decision making process.
Keep dreaming big it obviously suits you.
January 20th, 2006 at 9:28 pm
I think I would have been utterly heartbroken upon hearing I wasn’t getting a penguin… Far too distraught to think about a swimming pool in my living room… y’know, until I’d get the idea to throw a penguin-themed pool party, complete with mackeral!
January 21st, 2006 at 1:45 am
[…] Mia likes to swim. In fact, she has webbed paws. I’ve joked that I would like to get her a pool to swim in, however in an apartment in LA the only place we could put it would be in our living room. Someone was crazy enough to actually do it. […]
January 21st, 2006 at 8:47 am
You had no way of knowing whether that pool (yes 12 TONS) would have collapsed the floor and hurt or killed anyone living on a floor below.
Not so smart, guys. Not smart at all.
January 21st, 2006 at 8:50 am
Re: Engineer
First floor concrete slab, idiot.
January 21st, 2006 at 1:23 pm
I think what is so hilarious - is that when I first discovered that website I was so excited over the possibility that I could own my own penguin I had the exact same thoughts. Considering buying a 10 foot fish tank for my penguin. Thinking about how much money it could feasibly cost. Hoping to take him/her for walks around the neighborhood. Granted I never went as far as you - and that is certainly the funniest shit I have ever read. but, I feel your pain - just wanted to let you know! so sad that the website was a fake. Guess it’s easy to believe anything when it involves a penguin becoming your best friend.
January 22nd, 2006 at 3:15 pm
I’ve read everyones response to this story. Apparently some of you need to improve your reading comprehension skills. The guy has a house, not some 2nd or 3rd floor apartment. Yes, 12tons would some damage….but I believe he was in his own house and did not have to worry about humans living below him in case of a collapse. You should try it again, and put it your backward. Just give yourself a little extra room when mowing. First check and see if the climate you live in will support mr. penguin. Then, get the penguin.
January 22nd, 2006 at 10:24 pm
Was this built on a concrete floor? Seriously, I’m surprised 12-13 tons of water didn’t crash through the floor. Even 12″ joists would have trouble holding up that kind of weight.
January 23rd, 2006 at 2:23 am
I have to say that I never thought there were people that had the same thought process as myself and my friends. You rock dude!!! This is for sure something that my friends would do. Your next thing should be trying to aquire a polar bear. Good luck on that.
January 23rd, 2006 at 2:50 am
i built a swimming pool in my car once and filled it with pigeons. it spilled a lot when i drove my friends around. pools are made to be filled with naked girls licking each other, and the occasional penguin too i guess (if it’s naked as well).
January 23rd, 2006 at 4:26 pm
I hope they don’t, like, ever want to get rid of it.
January 23rd, 2006 at 6:09 pm
To end the fascinating debate - It’s on the first floor of a house. Some readers picked this up from the quote :
“I know I always tell you not to do your crazy ideas and you usually do anyway, but listen to me on this one. Don’t do it. You could crack your foundation or flood your house”
Thanks for visiting… I’ve got even crazier stories on the way.
January 23rd, 2006 at 9:41 pm
LOL ROFL dude that made me laugh so hard, it made my day…and i have pnuemonia too ROFL!
January 24th, 2006 at 12:26 am
so maybe everyone will realize now….ITS ON CONCRETE!
anyways, sorry about not getting the penguin. Maybe you could adopt one from some foreign website…gimme a few min and ill get a link. You can just send in like $20 a month to help feed it. I’ll, i mean they, will even send you pictures of your penguin. sound good? lol
January 24th, 2006 at 5:53 am
Some of you people seriously need to improve on your reading(and thinking) skills. Thankyou for the excellent post, very enjoyable… I was very sad to find out about you not getting a penguin
I would like a penguin too… or a duck, ducks are pretty cool too… maybe I could do this for a duck.
January 24th, 2006 at 11:49 am
Why didn’t Crystal get in the pool? Can we at least get some bikini shots?
January 24th, 2006 at 12:06 pm
Knock yourself out : http://public.fotki.com/slax/great_american_crui/crystal_bikini_extr/
Teamneon - I’m definitely in for sponsoring a penguin. Especially if they’ll let me rename him to Magellan.
January 24th, 2006 at 5:23 pm
Great story; it’s sad that you didn’t get a penguin maybe a nice puddy cat instead? This makes me want to join CostCo them seem like cool people.
January 24th, 2006 at 5:54 pm
I find it hard to believe that Chipchap was the only one that posted a comment that had a tiny piece of a clue. You obviously said you have a house, and I’m assuming a slab foundation. No chance of colapse there. You could have filled it with sand and had no problem. I guess people just don’t want to believe someone that wasn’t them did something so outrageous, and yet at the same time, so ingenious. Good for you for entertaining me for 5 minutes as you intended to do with this blog. By the way, GREAT decision making flow chart!! We all think it, but you put it in writing. Let us know your next half-brained project, and good luck with the penguin search.
January 24th, 2006 at 7:58 pm
Absolutely wonderful…and for those who don’t understand physics…the amount of weight on one square in is the weight of the water of one square inch of water times the height of the pool. A waterbed that is one the floor puts less pressure on the flooring than one that is in a frame on four legs. Old hippies had to figure this crap out…it’s the leaking you need to worry about…
January 25th, 2006 at 8:00 am
This is an absolutely awesome story.
January 25th, 2006 at 10:11 am
Crystal’s hot. Thanks for the pics! Do you get to nail her? You keep referring to her as your friend. What, like you girlfriend, your plutonic friend? What’s up? If she’s available, I want some of that.
January 25th, 2006 at 10:29 am
She’s a crazy bitch. Like ACTUALLY crazy.
She was my friend’s ex. She and I were just friends… until we found out that she was lying to my other friends and telling them that I was scamming them. She also told similar lies to me about them. Maybe I’ll write that story some day - really what’s stopping me is that she is actually crazy and might come to my house with a chainsaw or something.
January 25th, 2006 at 4:01 pm
I was so hoping for you to get your penguin. I almost had a tear when you said you didn’t get it! Funny story though. You also have some awesome friends for helping you out with all of this and nopt thinking your crazy! Kudos to all of you!!!
January 25th, 2006 at 11:08 pm
OMG that is the best idea I have ever heard. A penguin…in a pool…in your living room. That is so awesome. Sorry that those bastards tricked you though. It is kinda sad and pathetic in a small way…I mean here you were preparing and the whole time those “ass whips” were laughing at you…
I am thinking ostrich in the garden…
January 27th, 2006 at 3:33 pm
I’m really sorry you didn’t get your real Magellan. BUT the up side of this could be - if you would have gotten him, more than likely that is when you would have seen your disaster. If I remember correctly penguins have pretty sharp claws. Sharp claws and a VERY LARGE inflatable pool - yeah I think I can see it now.
Still loved the idea of the pool in the livingroom!! I would have tought of something like that too.
February 2nd, 2006 at 2:14 pm
When I first saw your photo, I thought “I hope you have a concrete floor”, and then I forgot about the pool completely when you turned Crystal over and she started to whimper and squeal noises like a Dolphin. What? You didn’t include audio? I must have been hearing things! Thanks for the supplemental pics…Looks like the pool was wet before you applied water!
February 3rd, 2006 at 10:17 am
wow, that’s a first! :O
February 3rd, 2006 at 1:38 pm
[…] What the heck are people thinking these days?? I mean, just look at this.. It’s totally ridiculous. Someone put a 3100 gallon pool in his living room! For crying out loud! Apparently it’s for his PET PENGUIN.. Yeah, something is wrong about this.. but a pool in the living room.. I don’t know, what do you think!? […]
February 3rd, 2006 at 2:41 pm
i fell for the site too, didn’t go out and buy a pool or anything, but i got prepared. damn bastards.
February 5th, 2006 at 4:37 pm
It’s a great story, shame about the lack of penguins.
Shame a bunch of idiots are talking about the people who live below him when you can quite clearly see he has a garden in one of the pictures and is thusly on the ground floor…unless it’s customary to have an immigrant family in your basement like american TV keeps telling me…
February 8th, 2006 at 1:14 pm
YOUR AN IDIOT!
February 9th, 2006 at 12:17 am
[…] Other than my usual decision making flowchart, it boiled down to one factor. I realized that if I didn’t go, I would probably wonder for the rest of my life what would have happened if I moved. If I went and it was a disaster… well, at least I gave it a shot. […]
February 14th, 2006 at 7:10 pm
Whaaa?
You must live near Gracy Farms, because my house looks exactly the same (sans indoor pool).
March 22nd, 2006 at 11:55 pm
Great story, but I was scared as hell for you. I mean, what is the weight of 3100 gallons of water at what is the structural load capacity of your Living Room floor! I was expecting to hear that the floor gave out and the pool, penguin, and you crashed through to the basement. Thank God it didn’t happen.
March 24th, 2006 at 4:08 am
[…] The Infamous Ghetto Indoor Pool » Tynan is… Better Than Your Boyfriend Hilarious story of penguins and indoor swimming pool (via) (tags: penguin swimming pool funny article indoor) […]
April 4th, 2006 at 12:51 pm
That is awesome! I might have to create one like that soon in my own pad.
May 11th, 2006 at 9:17 pm
A Collection of Carnies…
Kennedys Comedy” href=”http://drphattonys.blogspot.com/2006/05/carnival-of-kennedys-comedy.html”>Dr. Phat Tony’s: Carnival of Kennedys Comedy. Carnivals link to us. We link to Carnivals. Fair trade. Update: I decided to read some of the stories fro…
May 12th, 2006 at 9:18 am
[…] Dr Phat Tony has posted the carnival of comedy, and he provides a link to a build your own indoor swimming pool. Posted by tommy @ 9:18 am and Filed under Satire, Humor [link] [Trackback URL] […]
May 12th, 2006 at 4:19 pm
That is the funniest story ever. Especially returning it to Costco.
May 23rd, 2006 at 3:38 pm
casinos…
casinos free casino games casino online …
June 8th, 2006 at 3:15 pm
I have read this post several times and I laugh out loud every time.
Cheers Tynan,
Ryan
June 26th, 2006 at 7:18 pm
81 resource page…
81 resource page 73 resource page 82 resource page …
July 9th, 2006 at 2:01 am
you are my new hero, and i was wondering if you would mind me using your decision making flow chart, as it resembles the inner workings of my brain remarkably…I actually found your website as I was looking up information on the pet duck i am trying to acquire.
July 27th, 2006 at 6:13 am
I love you and want your kids.
July 29th, 2006 at 12:38 pm
god!!!!!!are you walking around in public amongst the rest of us???
August 26th, 2006 at 7:42 pm
A five-year contract worth at least 8.4 million for Scientific Games, of Norsk Tipping…
A five-year contract worth at least 8.4 million for Scientific Games, of Norsk Tipping Ambien Buy Xenical …
August 26th, 2006 at 7:56 pm
Online Baccarat…
Online Baccarat viagra Soma …
August 26th, 2006 at 8:18 pm
online casinos…
casinos play free casino game online online casino black jack online casino blackjack casino poker poker no deposit required online casino online black jack strategy online blackjack strategy poker on line casino bet.biz casino online snl jack black sn…
August 27th, 2006 at 1:54 am
casino payouts at online casino focus…
casino payouts at online casino focus free online casino slot jack blacks band jack blacks band poker stars.net casino 10 best online casino free black jack game free blackjack game free online poker Launch of Casino Focus .Com Site online casino news …
August 27th, 2006 at 4:30 am
slots…
slots online casino sign up bonus black jack game download blackjack game download game poker strip poker casino poker game online black train jack black train jack chip poker set gambling online casino wagering black jack download blackjack download e…
August 27th, 2006 at 8:21 am
adipex…
adipex actually complex to describe — but if you don’t practice self-discipline and use what slots know. If you want to win, you slots will often take a pounding in these slots slots I assume that will lead slots more than immediately meets the eye. …
August 29th, 2006 at 8:40 am
You are just a great guy that’s all I can about this. You obviously love animals and have the intelligence of a genius but the spark and energy of a child.
That’s just fantastic!
God bless you Brother,
Rose
PS: Get to work on changing the world immediately, that’s your calling.
September 5th, 2006 at 5:40 am
Loved the concept of a ‘Ghetto Indoor Pool’. I may just do that once the weather cools off. I have a 6×6x24 pool I can easily fit in my living room. I have all the equipment to install this bad-boy. Kudos buddy, next time have an indoor pool-party if you get the itch to do this again!
September 21st, 2006 at 4:39 pm
Oh! I can’t believe you tried that! It was too dangerous to even think about, and yet, you did it, risking the lives of everyone in your city!
Eleven Potential hazards of an indoor pool:
1. The foundation could collapse, killing the orphans that live below you.
2. The pool could leak, flooding the children’s Chemotherapy data tech center below you.
3. Shark Attack
4. cramps
5. Pirates
6. Carpool
7. Becoming stranded on a desert island in the pool.
8. Pirahnas
9. Water torture
10. Drowning
11. Pee
What you did with that pool should be illegal, based on it’s incredible danger. However, there are some benefits:
Potential Benefits
1. Excellent fire retardant with easy access
2. Buffer against temperature change
3. Swimming builds muscle and is easy on the joints
4. Easy to load water pistols
5. Prevents hair clogs in the shower
6. Roof leaks no longer ruin floor
7. Soup is ready!
8. You can watch television from the pool!
9. Reduced risk of sunburn
10. Skinny dipping, baby!
Thank you.
Rob
October 3rd, 2006 at 10:21 pm
This is fabulous. I had to restrain myself as I was at work when I found you via Stumble. So sorry to hear about Magellan.
October 17th, 2006 at 9:49 am
Decision Making Made Easy…
Finally! (From Tyan is better than your boyfriend)……
October 17th, 2006 at 11:20 pm
links for 2006-10-18…
Hamgirl Print Erin and I are thinking about ordering this print for our kitchen. (tags: Art Funny Design) The……
October 18th, 2006 at 8:06 pm
[…] Just go and read the story. Now. […]
October 19th, 2006 at 7:56 am
Terrific story — in fact, I was ready to order my own personal penguin until I learned the website was a hoax. Damn…seems like a phenominal business opportunity waiting to be snatched.
October 25th, 2006 at 6:20 am
good
October 31st, 2006 at 4:30 pm
[…] The Infamous Ghetto Indoor Pool » Tynan is… Better Than Your Boyfriend (tags: funny pool Humor Interesting) […]
November 11th, 2006 at 12:23 pm
I never thought it would be a hoax, thats pretty disappointing
December 1st, 2006 at 10:45 am
Tynan,
First of all, delete all these damn spam ads….mfers.
Second, while searching for you a place to adopt a pet penguin (still empty handed, but still looking) i ran across the scopes page for pet penguins. Seems the site was just a portfolio entry in some guys website…anyways, heres the link
December 9th, 2006 at 4:00 am
Amazing!
December 9th, 2006 at 5:23 am
A man after my own heart. I applaud you.
Smart move or not, I would have done the same thing.
…Except I probably would have kept the pool until disaster struck… then attempted litigation against Costco/pool manufacturer for not informing me on the packaging that the pool was for outdoor use only. .>
December 9th, 2006 at 7:57 am
[…] read more Bookmark to: Posted in Uncategorized […]
December 9th, 2006 at 1:10 pm
you are a moron
December 9th, 2006 at 7:44 pm
[…] Guia de Montagem […]
December 9th, 2006 at 10:07 pm
Did anyone say how much the penguin cost?
December 9th, 2006 at 11:02 pm
OK, this is so surreal that it would be totally unfunny on a sketch comedy show but is freakin’ hilarious! Kudos for your wit and originality and the *alls to return it to Costco!
December 9th, 2006 at 11:38 pm
Oh how I love Costco….this was hilarious. I’m sad that you didn’t get the penguin. I love watching them waddle…
December 10th, 2006 at 12:12 am
Im sure one of them peed in the pool for sure, good story.
December 10th, 2006 at 12:48 am
[…] Guy buys a penguin online and needs to install a swimming pool in his house so it has a good habitat. […]
December 10th, 2006 at 12:50 am
This is hilarious, I remember seeing this a while back but found this article on the front page of digg.com.
December 10th, 2006 at 1:40 am
you are my hero
December 10th, 2006 at 3:15 am
i dont know why that other guy is having such a hard time finding somewhere to adopt a penguin bc i found a few on my first search. they seem legit, but i didnt look too hard, so sorry if they arent. you can name them, recieve photos, etc. here ya go:
http://www.falklands.net/AdoptAPenguin.shtml
http://www.seabirds.org/adopt.htm
December 10th, 2006 at 11:21 am
[…] The Infamous Ghetto Indoor Pool […]
December 10th, 2006 at 9:22 pm
And I thought my returning a phone there after 2+ years was a big deal. I bow to your insanity. Of course it would have been better had you left it full of water and pulled it up in front of the store, but I guess it might’ve been tough getting it thru your front door. Rats!
December 11th, 2006 at 3:01 am
From a structural engineering point of view the load of a 1m (3ft)deep pool is some 7 times the allowed loading for a residential property.
You were lucky!
December 11th, 2006 at 9:13 am
can’t wait till that fails, and you flood your house, and kill everyone inside slowly by exposing them to black mold. I also hope you don’t have flood insurance and try to blame it on a broken pipe or some shit. I knew there were really fuckin’ stupid people in this world, but I thought they all lived in trailers.
December 11th, 2006 at 2:57 pm
w000t! That’s one nice pool
December 11th, 2006 at 7:18 pm
STFU you retarded cunt.
December 11th, 2006 at 7:41 pm
The Only Flowchart You’ll Ever Need…
Rules to live your life by….
December 11th, 2006 at 8:18 pm
I don’t believe it… no one can actually be that ignorant… buying penguins online? Maybe if the story went something like this: Me and my drunk frat brothers were having a party at the ΣΔΘ house and we though it would be a great idea to have a full blown pool inside our commons room for our annual wet t-shirt contest, and I said, “dude” and Ragin’ Johnny said “bro” and…blah, blah, blah.
December 12th, 2006 at 12:33 am
Your father was right: you’re crazy. It was just dumb luck you didn’t seriously mess up your house.
December 12th, 2006 at 9:32 am
Funny story… but did you have to return the pool? It’s people like you who will ruin Costco’s great return policy for the rest of us. Sooner or later they’re going to change their policy because they can’t keep eating the costs for people like you. Thanks for nothing.
December 12th, 2006 at 10:08 am
I usually assume a gallon of water weighs about 9 pounds.
3,100 gallons at about 9 pounds is about 27,900 pounds
The pool is a circle with diameter 15 feet. So its floor area is Pi*7.5^2, or about 176 square feet.
So, the weight of the pool is about 27,900 / 176 = 158 pounds per square foot.
I vaguely recall that most residential floors are designed to hold around 50 pounds per square foot. The pool exceeded that by a factor of 3.
You got lucky.
December 12th, 2006 at 10:47 am
I once sat up three 24 ft. pools on the ninth floor of a building.
It was to be a cafe and we had to load test the slab for the weight
limit.
December 12th, 2006 at 2:07 pm
sweet pool man. i would sure hate to see the owner of that houses face when he sees the repair and cleanup bill if your pool breaks.
December 12th, 2006 at 6:02 pm
u r so lukcy …
i dont think i can get away with something like that …
hehhe …
kewl pics …
December 12th, 2006 at 6:03 pm
You’re like one of my heros. I’m especially impressed that you returned the pool. I need a membership to Costo.
December 13th, 2006 at 1:49 am
Hey man, i did this 3 years ago, we bought inflatable pools and put them on the 2nd floor of my buddy’s house, we filled them up, and chilled in them for a couple of days until we went downstairs and noticed that the roof was cracking, we decided to return the pools as well. It’s good to know we’re not the only ones
December 13th, 2006 at 3:55 am
twat, wot a gay idea, wot the f7uk woz u finking dude i cudda cum up wid dat i my slep get a fucking luife twat!!!!!
December 13th, 2006 at 5:07 am
That is the single most funny thing I have ever read lol.. I’m gutted you didn’t get your penguin!!
December 13th, 2006 at 9:03 am
Really funny, though I doubt if you’d find a house like that in the ghetto!
December 13th, 2006 at 10:04 am
Wonderful. But why didn’t you just populate it with bass or something? Or fill it with Jello! Quite a lot of Jello? But worth it (and THEN still take it back to Costco)… VERY damned cool. Sand woulda been kewl too. Then you coulda gotten naked mole rats or gophers… Very kewl. Congrats on your brilliance. I live in a concrete slab house too…
December 13th, 2006 at 10:36 am
just when you think you’ve seen everything….I’m sorry you are penguin deprived….and I applaud your determination to provide a suitable enviroment…how ever…you are a fortunate man….DID YOU KNOW THAT WATER WEIGHS ABOUT 10 LBS. A GALLON??!!!!
you must have an extremly well built home…let’s see…3100 gallons@10 pounds per….OMG!!
December 13th, 2006 at 11:34 am
lol..this is soooo funny
i think having a pet penguin must one the most awesome things in live!
December 13th, 2006 at 12:19 pm
it says that it’s posted on numerous sites.
learn to read.
December 13th, 2006 at 12:28 pm
[…] about the Penguins and the Indoor Swimming Pool. | Add To Del.icio.us | Digg This | Related Stuff | NoImages? […]
December 13th, 2006 at 12:48 pm
That is freaking awe-shum. Way to go out on a limb!
It takes a big set o’ stones to do what you did. I’m envious because I do have a basement and couldn’t do it in my family room. Then again, I do have a basement, with drainage…heh heh heh I’m going to Costco after work.
December 13th, 2006 at 1:15 pm
So, my friend Jenny and I looked at penguinwarehouse.com about a year ago, and we were also really excited at the prospect of owning a penguin. To find out it was a fake, especially for you with all the work you did really bummed my day out. Oh well, at least they took your pool back.
December 13th, 2006 at 1:37 pm
I think he was made aware of the danger to his foundations by his father if you actually bother to read it.
Also, why would there be people living below him?
December 13th, 2006 at 2:26 pm
Thats entertainment!
December 13th, 2006 at 3:19 pm
wow! i can’t stop laughing, my mom thinks im insane. this is definitly printer worthy
December 13th, 2006 at 3:56 pm
I screamed “HOOOOLLYYY SHIT” when I saw that you could buy a penguin at that website.
I’m crushed. I was going to name mine pen-pen.
December 13th, 2006 at 7:46 pm
U ACTUALLY own Penguins!? Penguins are SOOO cute! That would be so cute to just see a Penguin on a water slide!!!
December 13th, 2006 at 7:48 pm
p.s. im sooo going 2 ” http://www.penguinwarehouse.com” !!!
December 13th, 2006 at 10:13 pm
8 lbs per gallon.
December 14th, 2006 at 12:07 am
I love it! I’ve always wanted a pet penguin!!!
December 14th, 2006 at 9:33 am
its “people like you” ha ha… there is only one and he is Tynan
December 14th, 2006 at 9:37 am
Those are websites where you can send money to support(adopt) a penguin.. They never actully send you the animal.
December 14th, 2006 at 11:04 am
8lbs per gallon * 31,000 = 1/4 million pounds.
December 14th, 2006 at 12:57 pm
a story definately worth reading at work. thank you.
December 14th, 2006 at 1:38 pm
Yes. Yes, yes, yes, yes, yes. Oh and Yes.
December 14th, 2006 at 3:27 pm
hi this is Mike Peer
December 14th, 2006 at 4:37 pm
Ya know. I’m sorry. I am. Maybe I’m weak, or give in too easily to temptation… I woulda poked a good sized hole in that pool. I couldn’t have possibly resisted that.
December 14th, 2006 at 5:25 pm
Seriously the most entertaining thing I’ve read all week. Kudos and thank you.
December 14th, 2006 at 9:23 pm
oh holy friggin hell…when i got to the part with the manager it all hit me and i laughed so hard i drooled all over myself and my keyboard!
December 14th, 2006 at 10:38 pm
Too bad this was before the age of YouTube. It would be an instant hit to see a video of this online
December 15th, 2006 at 7:51 am
I’m only slightly impressed. Had you chosen to conduct this experiment on a 2nd story level I would have been awed. As it is, thank you for your attempt. I is entertaining.
- Mr. Critical
December 15th, 2006 at 4:49 pm
this story would have been better if the pool exploded in your house after getting the bad news about the penguin site being a hoax.
December 15th, 2006 at 4:50 pm
what i said was harsh. i’m sorry.
December 15th, 2006 at 7:30 pm
what the hell is the matter with you, mojotek? ok it’s a go?? who says that?
December 16th, 2006 at 4:17 pm
shut up ass
December 16th, 2006 at 11:13 pm
Damn that’s soooo cool
I wish I had a penguin, it’ll have its own little pool in the garden ^_^. lol seriously though, I live in tenerife and over here has the world’s LARGEST penguinarium. That doesn’t make too much sense though, since it’s so hot. The penguins live in a really dark room and there’s a conveyer belt that takes you round the tank thing, and there’s always chillout music playing, so the penguins have got a pretty laid back lifestyle lol.
December 17th, 2006 at 12:29 am
LOL Wonderful job! Very funny and quite entertaining reading. I’m sorry that you got your hopes up about the penguin, and I want to say absolutely, positively, do NOT try to get a polar bear. (Not that you could, due to Federal regulations and local “dangerous animal” laws prohibiting owning them.) Certain species are considered endangered for a reason… Donate to help them - don’t try to take them from their natural environments. But again, this is a really great read. Thank you for sharing.
December 17th, 2006 at 1:28 pm
I loved the story. Period.
December 17th, 2006 at 4:01 pm
Collin you are a pretty big asshole dude and if you were here in front of me i would beat the shit out of you just for being a little fagget bitch.
December 19th, 2006 at 9:13 am
Shut up please
December 19th, 2006 at 9:17 am
Because……..no one asked u so who cares what u think.
December 19th, 2006 at 9:26 am
HUMANS!!! And what on earth are you? I dont care who you are thats funny right there!!!
December 19th, 2006 at 9:40 am
Great enthusiasm, but it wasnt that funny. You obviously have a problem. I’m having a hard time figuring out what it is!!
December 19th, 2006 at 9:52 am
” Costco’s great return policy ” whatever poindexter. Thank you for something stupid.
December 19th, 2006 at 9:56 am
You think your cool cuz u know big words!
December 19th, 2006 at 10:08 am
Do you know what you just said? Me either. Its hard when you first learn to ah…….”Speaka the English.”
December 19th, 2006 at 10:13 am
Hey! A bird-fish would be cool……..to EAT! I would fry em’ and put hot sauce on them shits!!!!!!
December 19th, 2006 at 4:27 pm
ya, they don’t call em happy feet for nothin’.
December 19th, 2006 at 6:38 pm
I find it bizarre commentary on our society that when you say
“…if I had a pool that big at my house. The only problem is that my backyard is small and the robomower might cut the pool up. I considered putting it in the garage…”
that so many people assumed from this that you live on the 2nd floor of an apartment building. Maybe they should try leaving Manhattan sometime. But then again, anyone who has actually been around a real penguin… probably knows they smell like ass and would eat your dog.
December 19th, 2006 at 9:53 pm
Hi!
cause im so getting a monkey when im older! except im gonna name him Marcel, from Friends. Gotta love him. Anyways, kepp the rest of us posted on your next andventure!
this has got to be the funniest story ever. Sad thing is, that would totally be something I would want to do, but be afraid to do it. Go for the monkey next. He can also be called …M…whatever it is you wanted to name the penguin.
December 19th, 2006 at 11:46 pm
yea man, this is a master card commercial….1) out door pool = $400 1) house - $120,000 Finding out your plan to have a live penguin move into your new indoor(outdoor) pool…in your living room is only a shortlived dream…Priceless haha, i wish i still had the pics but I did this in my basement one time with a huge thick tarp for covering tobacco, lined the floor and wall about 4 feet high…took 3 solid days to fill and when i tried to drain it, by cutting the tarp at the floor drains…the septic tank filled up…DisAstEr. but you my friend, pulled this off well, Props.
December 20th, 2006 at 12:37 am
Wow! You rule!
December 20th, 2006 at 4:13 am
Hey Dan Bryant. Your a homo.
December 20th, 2006 at 10:58 am
I would listen to Manofmanycolors. Men who like many colors often beat ‘fagget bitches’ up do to their deep-seeded homophobia.
December 20th, 2006 at 11:53 am
UR STORY IS OFF DA CHAINS
December 20th, 2006 at 4:20 pm
ZOD, THAT WAS GREAT! ROTFLM(MF)AO!!!
December 20th, 2006 at 4:24 pm
WELL GLAD TO SEE YOU KEPT YOUR COMMENT SHORT AND SWEET.
WHAT AN IDIOT!
December 20th, 2006 at 4:37 pm
HEY DAVE, WE GOT TO REMEMBER THAT THERE ARE PEOPLE THAT JUST DON’T READ OR DO RESEARCH BEFORE THEY EXPRESS THEIR OPINIONS. LEAVE IT TO PEOPLE LIKE YOU AND ME TO PRAY AND HOPE THESE PEOPLE DON’T VOTE. (REFERRING TO GINGER)
December 20th, 2006 at 5:01 pm
ONCE AGAIN WE HAVE A WINNER! QUICK BOB TELL HIM WHAT HE WON!
YOU IDIOT! CAN YOU NOT READ? THEY LIVE IN A HOUSE. THEY PUT IT IN THEIR LIVINGROOM. NOBODY IS ON THE FLOOR BELOW CAUSE THEIR AIN’T ONE. YOUR ELAVATOR DOESN’T GO ALL THE WAY TO THE TOP DOES IT? WELL LET ME TELL YOU A DISTURBING SECRET. YOU ONLY HAVE ONE FLOOR!!
PS PLEASE DON’T VOTE.
December 20th, 2006 at 5:03 pm
THANK YOU
December 20th, 2006 at 5:15 pm
YES CONCRETE SLAB. IT DIDN’T CRASH SO THERE. YEAH THAT IS A LOT OF WEIGHT. WOW YOU ARE SMART.
RE-READ THE STORY YOU MISS THE WHOLE THING!
December 20th, 2006 at 5:56 pm
That would depend upon “codes”.
December 20th, 2006 at 6:23 pm
O HOW I HAVE WAITED TO TALK TO “MOM” LIKE THIS.
WHAT IS YOUR FUCKING PROBLEM? HUH? HOW COULD YOU SET YOUR HOPES SO LOW? DO YOU GET OFF ON SOME SICK PLEASURE OF PEOPLE FAILING? WHAT ARE FROM BRENTWOOD OR SOMETHING? O NEVERMIND, YOU PROBABLY DON’T KNOW WHAT THAT IS. LET ME GUESS BORN WITH THE SILVER SPOON IN DA MOUTH? NEVER HAD TO WORK FOR ANYTHING MAYBE? OR MAYBE YOU HAD NOTHING AND YOU FELT SORRY FOR YOURSELF AND STILL HAVE NOTHING BECAUSE YOU NEVER DID ANYTHING ABOUT IT. I DON’T KNOW AND I REALLY COULD NOT GIVE ANY LESS WHO YOU ARE OF WHERE YOU CAME FROM. MUCH LESS HOW hard YOU HAD IT. I’LL TELL YOU THIS MUCH…ONE OF THESE DAYS, AND I HOPE IT’S ME, YOU ARE GOING TO SAY THE WRONG THING TO THE WRONG PERSON AND YOU WILL GET YOURS. DO YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN TRAILERS? I GREW UP WITH NOTHING. I TOOK BATHS IN A FUCKING CREEK. LIVING IN AND OUT OF BUSES. SCROUNDGING FOR FOOD. TOOK BEATINGS FROM MY MOM AND MELSESTED BY MY STEP FATHER. WELL I GOT BALLS TO TELL A FRIEND ONE DAY. PUT MYSELF IN STATES CUSTODY AND MADE SOMETHING OF MYSELF. I FINISHED SCHOOL, I HAVE A HOME OF MY OWN (PAID FOR)A FULL TIME JOB FOR A FLAWLESS COMPANY. I HAVE NO CHILDREN AND I AM NOT MARRIED. I HAVE WHAT I HAVE BECAUSE I HAVE WORKED MY ASS OFF FOR IT. I HAD A DEAD BEAT MOM AND DAD I NEVER MET. TO TOP IT ALL OFF I A 22 YEAR OLD FEMALE. SO SUCK MY DICK AND YOU TELL ME HOW GOD DAMN STUPID I AM.
December 21st, 2006 at 9:57 am
It’s incredibly stupid to try and keep a penguin as a pet. They practically crap their body weight every day, they bite, and it’d probably get seized by animal control, since I’m pretty sure keeping one as a pet is illegal as hell.
December 21st, 2006 at 11:38 am
seriously. this story cracked me the hell up! I love that everyone is all butt hurt as to the penguin and whether the f0ing foundation will break or not. IT DIDN’T.
der.
The true point to take from this is: Costco rules!
December 21st, 2006 at 11:42 am
questions: if you were ever serious about buying a penguin and that setup, how exactly did you plan on cleaning the pool? it’s going to crap fish guts all over it. I’m also really curious why the heck you want to keep a cold-water bird “indoor and warm”.
December 21st, 2006 at 2:26 pm
Great project!! Bummer,no penguins:) I’d have tried an otter,LOL Plus I would have dug up psrt of the slab and installed a permanent pool. Pythons are easy to keep too. Only allowed one Piranna though. Good luck on next project!! Bummer=Crystals site outdated???
December 21st, 2006 at 3:37 pm
Dude, I was all excited when I started reading until I found out you didnt get the penguin. I want you to have one someday!
December 21st, 2006 at 3:59 pm
The only thing better than astoundingly stupid people are astoundingly stupid people so unaware they are morons, they proudly show off their moronicity. You were dumb enough to think you could mail order a live penguin. Dumb enough to want to adopt an animal that would be way out of it’s habitat and which you had no idea how to care for (hint: that pool would be full of penguin shit and bacteria pretty quickly). And dumb enough to think its cool to have a business sustain a loss of, what, a couple of hundred bucks, because you’re a moron? I hope someday some other moron costs you a couple of hundred bucks for no good reason, but then morons as dumb as you are sooooo far and few between. Your poor parents, they must feel so guilty for drinking during the pregnancy or dropping you on your head or whatever they did to make you such a complete tard.
December 21st, 2006 at 11:51 pm
I set up a similar pool on my back porch this summer for my dog. She had trouble getting in and out of it. I tried to build a staircase over the top of it but its convex shape made it difficult. Ultimately she punctured the side with her nails. Try as I might, I couldn’t drain the darn thing completely so it sat there and became a mosquito breeding ground. I tried to take it back, but was asked to leave by a Wal-Mart associate.
Moral of the story, penguines have shorter legs than dogs, so magellen might have needed a boost, and kudos to you for trying.
December 22nd, 2006 at 3:35 am
I think its werid cause I would of totally belived the site and i guess they should of told you about it not being real when you started to get all excited. I like magellen as a name and am dearly sorry for your loss my mother also wanted a penguin and was going to put it in the tube and feed it cheese.. not a healthy diet.. but i was determined to buy her one .. no luck yet ! she was going to name it Sir Pepin
December 22nd, 2006 at 3:51 am
what a fag
December 22nd, 2006 at 1:24 pm
I enjoyed the story.
I once put a pool in my bedroom, while at boarding school.
It was a bit smaller than yours but afterwards I though “Crikey! That was dumb!” If it had spilled out I would have been in major trouble. That and of course the weight issue — I think I worked out that I had a couple of tonnes of water in the room. Risky…
Anyway, I enjoyed your story a lot.
Ben
December 23rd, 2006 at 5:52 am
i justed looked at the pics and it looks so cool.
December 28th, 2006 at 4:10 pm
Is this a basement apt ? How did the floor not collapse ? Hard to believe… I had one of those things in my backyard, and it was a heavy niggah.
December 28th, 2006 at 4:12 pm
bugga-lugga-loo bugga-lugga-loo, I’m over here now.
December 29th, 2006 at 5:35 pm
[…] Great story about a guy who thought he bought a penguin and needed a place to keep it. He decided to buy an inflatable pool at Costco and put it in his living room. Makes sense. Too bad he never got his penguin. Lots of pictures included of a sight you don’t see every day. […]
December 30th, 2006 at 8:42 am
Costco got screwed in this deal, but then again the manager could have pushed back a little harder. Nice job of articulating what went through my mind reading this entry.
January 4th, 2007 at 4:04 am
Ok first best story i have heard in a long time. my bf’s roommate sent me the link when i mentioned that i was pretty sure i could fit a hot tub in my bedroom. i’m pretty sure you can all see how they linked the two together. second, really who doesnt love a cute penguin? i would so get one if i thought i could. and to Ben…i have a duck.
January 4th, 2007 at 5:53 pm
This story is inspired by homo’s and large amounts of crack cocaine. “Remember kids cocaine is a powerful drug!” Try this at home!
January 6th, 2007 at 9:48 pm
Talking to the manager must have been fun!
Great project!
January 8th, 2007 at 6:23 pm
That was cool but I think keeping a pet penguin is illegal
January 8th, 2007 at 6:56 pm
That is soooooooooo cool. I want a pool in my house. I also agree about the penguins. Why don’t you do some real research and see if you can find a penguin to buy-it would be totally awesome! But…Where does it crap?
January 9th, 2007 at 9:56 am
Wow,
That is Hilarious. Its a great idea.
January 9th, 2007 at 12:27 pm
[…] http://www.betterthanyourboyfriend.com/the-infamous-ghetto-indoor-pool.htm […]
January 13th, 2007 at 1:51 am
Buy cialis generic….
Order generic cialis online. Cialis generic. Generic cialis picture. Cialis generic south africa. Generic cialis discount. Cialis generic overseas prices….
January 16th, 2007 at 2:03 pm
If a tree falls in the forest and nobody is around to hear it, does it still make a sound? YES.
Just because the pool did not collapse the floor, it does not make it safe.
There was no previous mention whether this was a slab foundation or a basement foundation, so “Engineer” was simply pointing this out in case someone else with a “basement foundation” decides to try this in their own house (it is bound to happen, there are plenty of uninformed people)
I agree with “Engineer” above. If this house has a basement, the floor could have collapsed AT ANY TIME, whether there were people around or not. It is extremely lucky that nothing happened and that nobody was in the basement watching TV if the supporting floor did fail. Believe it or not, even though nobody may live in the basement, it is often considered living space just the same.
If this house has a slab foundation, “piles” that support the house are usually installed around the perimeter of the foundation and underneath supporting walls. The living-room is a large open area with no supporting walls in the center. This means that 12 TONS OF WATER WOULD CRACK THAT SLAB FOUNDATION and exert unnecessary stress to the walls and floor nearby. At best a slab foundation has between 4-6 inches of concrete (except along perimeter walls) and this CANNOT support 12 tons of anything.
Besides the very unsafe nature of this pool installation, I found this story extremely hilarious. The writer has a good sense of humour and her delivery of the story is great. Well done. Please consider your father’s advice in the future.
January 16th, 2007 at 2:27 pm
I am sorry to hear about your past, but that still does not mean that you know enough about structural engineering or construction to criticize those who have pointed out the obvious dangers of putting a 12 ton weight in the center of a thin concrete slab.
Believe it or not, more people in North America (USA and Canada) live in houses with basement foundations than in houses with slab foundations. Therefore, it is not uncommon that some people would think about the dangers associated with a basement foundation.
For your information, Basements prevent foundation shifting due to freeze/thaw cycles in colder climates, and maximize square footage without unnecesarily adding height to walls that will be exposed to colder weather that will require insulation (because the walls are buried and not exposed)
So before you belittle those who know more than you about construction, why don’t you keep your unintelligent comments to yourself. You do nobody any good. These people have probably forgotten more than you know. I hope one day that you do something stupid and it goes wrong because you are too close-minded to listen to anyone else.
January 20th, 2007 at 4:40 pm
[…] Picture via The Fishbowl, original drawing by Better than your Boyfriend […]
January 21st, 2007 at 2:02 am
awww…that is so sad…not the pool part, but the not getting a penguin part. i was all excited for you and wanted to see your little penguin playing in his pool. i’m so sorry. *sniffle*
January 21st, 2007 at 8:31 pm
Very funny. That’s the kind of absurd project I’d put a lot of effort into, too. Amazing photos and the flow chart is dead-on!
January 26th, 2007 at 4:37 pm
This is brilliant and you are brilliant. Thanks for the hilarious story! I’ve been passing it around to friends all day and they love it.
January 29th, 2007 at 1:30 pm
This was the first article on your blog I ever read (last week sometime). I found it while bumbling along in a now-forgotten Google search. I laughed my butt off. It inspired me to start writing about a few of my own goofy ideas and adventures at http://www.4fraziers.com with the advice you posted on starting a blog.
Thanks for the entertainment!
February 10th, 2007 at 10:04 pm
That is…. SOOO funny!!!! But I am very sorry about Mallegan.
February 12th, 2007 at 1:39 pm
sooo funny! I just stumbled upon this site and am sooo glad I did just because of this. Holy crap, will you be my new best friend???
February 20th, 2007 at 9:51 pm
frickin killed me,..my gf sent me to this site lol…
hey seeing how i live up here in canada,,,i could probally catch ya one…:P and send it,,,…
February 26th, 2007 at 2:53 pm
Penguins are only in the southern hemisphere moron…
March 11th, 2007 at 1:42 pm
You look so cute in the pics, how old are you ? you are the stupidest person in the world but if you insist why have a swimming pool in a house room? You are still cute cute cute cute cute cute ccccuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuutey bye sexy boy love Rhiannan xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
March 26th, 2007 at 2:48 pm
[…] out this hilarious link to see what im talking about haha i laugh out loud every time i read this clicky __________________ Eheim pimp […]
April 1st, 2007 at 8:35 pm
I laughed so hard I popped a ‘roid!
April 24th, 2007 at 9:52 pm
[…] would oyu do if you were to get a penguin? get an Indoor pool? well read about it here… http://www.betterthanyourboyfriend.c…ndoor-pool.htm 0 […]
April 28th, 2007 at 10:53 am
[…] then I remembered THIS. It’s pretty much the funniest damn thing I’ve ever read. Go on, read […]
May 1st, 2007 at 12:37 pm
[…] Well, it turns out that the whole penguin thing was a hoax, plus the guy could barely sleep for worrying that the pool would rupture in his house or something, so eventually he drained it and returned it to Costco - because of course they’ll take anything back. Read the entire story here. […]
May 1st, 2007 at 4:29 pm
Hey man, I’m looking into buying a penguin my self and was checking out penguinwarehouse.com and thanks for giving me a heads up, cool story man. But I wanted to know if it is possible to actually even buy a penguin?
email me twig160@aim.com
PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!